Friday, November 05, 2004

Should I Throw This Pair of Underwear Out?

Me and Kristin have been battling about this for quite some time now. I've had this pair of underwear for about six or seven years now. I've grown to love them; they're soft, they're familiar, they have a built-in neutral odor. But Kristin says she's embarrassed to see them. When we're doing laundry, she doesn't want anyone to see them.

I think that's ridiculous. Who cares what someone thinks of my underwear? Why throw them out? The elastic still is intact. They still fit. There's no reason to throw out something still useful.

I've taken a few pictures of them. Take a look:


This is what they would look like to anyone that might see me in my underwear, perhaps a sexy lady or two. You can't tell much is wrong with them. The only thing is the waistband; it's a little ripped and torn. But does this warrant tossing them into the trash? I think not.


A closer shot of the waistband. I think girls have to realize guys have different rules when it comes to clothes. Most guys will wear an article of clothing until it is disintegrating while they wear it. Most of my clothes I've had for probably somewhere in the 5 to 7 year range. I take good care of them. They don't need to be retired unless they are beyond wear. I wear the football shirt we got in 9th grade at least once a week. It's not ripping, it doesn't have huge holes in it. Why throw it out?

Kristin has only one point when it comes to this issue, and its this:


If you can't see it, there is huge hole in the crotch of these underoos. Even though I don't walk around in my underwear, I can still understand how this could be viewed as the time to get rid of them.

But I refuse to give in. I refuse to throw them away for the simple fact that they can still perform their primary function; protecting the goods from being exposed to the elements.

I think girls just have a warped idea of when it is time to take something out of your rotation. I have about a 10 day rotation, and these still have a place in them. As long as the entire bottom doesn't fall apart, thereby making it a skirt, these will stay with me for the foreseeable future.

Or am I crazy? Should I throw them out? Put in a comment and let me know.

2 comments:

Lisa Rocks said...

It's time to let them go. MAYBE if it was just the elastic band wearing away, I'd say keep them. But you got a big hole in the crotch. What happens if you get in a car accident and they have to cut your pants off? You'll have this huge hole and everything can be seen by all.
No one wants that. I say ask Santa for a new pair for christmas.

Dave said...

If I'm in a car accident, 1) I think I'll have more important things going on than the state of my underwear, and 2) if they're cutting my pants off anyway, I'm sure they'd be getting a glimpse of the goods sooner or later.

Besides, who cares if there's a hole in the crotch? it's not like my nuts are going to go through the hole and come out the bottom of my pants. Even though they are so large it's possible, I usually keep them in line with some bungee cords, so I doubt it will happen.