Miami Makes Me Proud

My hometown folks made me very happy the other night during the Orange Bowl. As you know, I have an intense hatred for Ashlee Simpson, who gets more press than she deserves, usually by people like me talking about how much they hate her. It's permissible, however, because usually when people are talking about her, it's because she fucked up royally.

She has done it again; during the Orange Bowl, she performed the halftime show. Why they would book her to sing for 70,000 football fans, I'll never know. Anyway, so she is up on the stage "singing". You can tell it is her voice now, because it just sounds like someone with a sore throat yelling. She finishes the song, and IMMEDIATELY a torrential downpour of boo's begins. I am so glad that ABC didn't cut the audience's reaction; networks have a tendency to filter out negative responses with some canned cheering.

On one hand, I feel embarrassed for her; imagine doing that, and having EVERYONE boo you in a stadium full of people. But this hand that feels bad, it is just a tiny pygmy hand. People should not have to just accept and love someone just because they are out there singing. There is no reason we should be the music industry and TV network's slaves, eating up anything they throw at us. Just because she has a famous sister, a sinister, evil father/manager, a poorly done and heavily edited TV show, an album so digitally mixed it is unrecognizable, and appears on every talk show on television, doesn't mean we should just accept it. We should be proactive in who we allow these billion-dollar companies to push on us, and refuse to accept some with literally no talent, no matter how much advertising and PR they use on us. Make them at least choose someone attractive, instead of some crow-faced skank bomber.

Thank you, Miami.

(If you have no clue what I am babbling about, watch the cringe-inducing performance here.)

This is Devastatin' Dave, the Turntable Slave, signing off.