The M-1 Abrams Holiday Roundup

Since I have been home, I haven't really had a spare minute to just sit and relax, much less post something on here. With various errands, chores, Christmas shopping, and working, I've been as busy during this break as I am up at school. Let me catch all of you (and I honestly doubt there are many) up to speed:

- I have been working non-stop at News 12 since I've gotten home. Being the holidays, people were taking vacation days and calling in sick all over the place, and I was there to fill in. This is fantastic, except I still had a fair amount of shopping to do, and it was hard to get done when I would be called in a lot. Fortunately, now that Christmas is over, I really have nothing more to do, so the work will be appreciated. However, I suspect that since the holidays are over, less people will be calling out, and I will be getting fewer hours. Such is life.

- Work was real hectic the first week, simply because of the transit workers strike in New York City. Since breaking news and new info was coming out randomly and at all hours, everyone there was pretty tense; their nerves were shot, and you could feel it in the air. In fact, during one news conference where we had to break in live, I saw people screaming at each other, producers and directors running around at full tilt, and just general hysteria breaking loose. Before the strike was officially announced, nobody was sure when the word might come from the transit union, so they needed to keep the place staffed 24 hours a day, and one night I worked from two in the afternoon to three in the morning. It was all rough, hectic, and stressful, especially considering things are still relatively new to me and I'm not there all the time, but hopefully I made a good impression with the boss and I made some good money.

-I was having trouble thinking of a Christmas gift, and I was coming down to the wire searching for something my parents could get me for the holiday. I told them all I could think of was a big TV, since all the other gadgets and gizmos I have are still in good working order, but that was out of the question, since they're thousands of dollars. One morning, I walked downstairs, and my parents confronted me, saying that if I wanted as a combined Christmas and graduation gift, they would get me a new TV. We searched around all day for one, and finally settled on an LG 37-inch LCD HDTV. I know, I know, I'm spoiled rotten, I'm aware. But I don't really get spoiled by them anymore, and I do feel guilty.

That is until I turn it on. We got an HDTV cable box, so I can get HD programming in various sorts. We bought the set about a week before Christmas, and since it was so big and wouldn't really fit anywhere else, we set it up in my room early, however I was not allowed to watch it until the 25th. I had to sit with my regular TV plugged in in front of it for days.



Looking at the picture gives you a good sense of not only how huge the new TV is, but also how crazy it was making me to have this beautiful piece of technology sitting in front of my face and not being able to partake in its sweet, soothing digital glow. Finally, Christmas day came, and I was free to wallow in my own crapulence.



The TV has been the focal point of my life for the past few days. I only get a handful of channels which take advantage of the HD, so I've been watching shows I have no interest in just to look at the amazing picture quality. I've watched more PBS in the last four days than ever in my life. I'm anticipating the release of the PS3 even more now so I can take full advantage of the new games/Blu-Ray system.

- Despite getting arguably the best Christmas gift I've ever received (Red Ryder BB gun excluded), I still did fairly well on Christmas Day. Kristin got me about ten books, including a cookbook designed for those who want a big variety but have limited cooking appliances/experience. I got a remote control holster thing to hold my now plethora of controllers next to my bed, the obligatory socks/underwear, the seventh season of the Simpsons, a samurai sword set, and other knicknacks making for all in all a very merry Christmas.

Today I have a day off, and it is miserable outside, cold and raining, so today has become a good day to just sit in my room and do absolutely nothing. I might go to the gym later, but that's about it. Our New Year's plans are still up in the air, still might be going into the city, but not in the same nature as previously thought. I also have to work New Year's Day at 12:30, so I can't really go overboard.

Now you're all caught up on my life. Hopefully I'll still be working a lot, and maybe try to sneak some fun in on the side, before I go back to school.

Until then, Happy New Year.




Happy Holidays from Black Mamba!

The Wrath of Kong

I saw Jarhead about two months ago, and during the previews the trailer for King Kong was shown. I knew this movie was being produced, but I really didn't have much interest in seeing it; I hadn't seen the original, and it just seemed like a Hollywood get-rich-quick scheme.

And they showed the CGI of Kong, and the '30s setting, which were par for the course in my mind, and didn't really seem too fascinating.

That was until the T-Rex scene.

They show this dinosaur screaming, then King Kong jumps in and starts screaming, it get quiet, the T-Rex charges Kong, he goes nuts, quickly thumps his chest, and put his hands on both sides of the T-Rex's jaws as the screen goes to white. This for me was one of those moments where you know what goes on behind the white flash frame has to be something incredible. With my mouth agape, I turn around to see the five or six people I went to the theater with making the same exact expression as I was. The action looked tempting, and knowing that Peter Jackson had done well with the action scenes in the Lord of the Rings movies, I thought this couldn't be bad, and began to anticipate seeing Kong in a few months.

I was right. After finding out it was premiering the night I was done with finals, and really wanting to see it with Gish, Silva, and the rest of our band of fools because we feed off each other's excitement, making it even more exciting. We showed up early for the midnight showing, anticipating some sort of line. We walked in, and we waiting at the concession stand, when we got an idea of who we would be watching this film with: some slovenly fat guy with a ponytail comes up behind us, and proclaims to the employees, "I hear you have the best nachos in town......I WOULD LIKE TO PARTAKE!"

It was unmistakable: nerds. We would be watching this movie with a theater full of nerds. And we were right. They were everywhere. I guess nerds have a pledge of loyalty to Peter Jackson.

Finally, the movie started. Having watched the original a few weeks ago, I knew the story fairly well, and was able to pick up a lot of parallels included throughout. The first hour of Jackson's was actually kind of slow; the first movie set the story up well in a third of the time. It wasn't like it added anything to the story, and seemed to be so drawn out just to get the movie to the standard 3-hour length for an epic.

But once they get onto Skull Island, ridiculous. That's the only way to put it. What is so great about it is that it doesn't try too hard to be artsy or deep, it's just pure entertainment, something rare these days when going to the movies. I don't get too excited at the movies anymore, but for two hours I was on the edge of my seat, yelling and giggling like a little girl. When the part with the T-Rex came up, me, Gish, and Silva all started saying, "Here it comes, oh boy! Oh boy!" Despite acting a little immature for three twentysomethings, it was a great movie experience. I don't want to ruin any of the parts by saying what goes down, and besides, even if I did, it wouldn't do justice to actually watching it.

If you enjoy being happy and having fun, see King Kong.

Grade: A-



If this doesn't look cool to you, you're probably dead. Or gay.

This Guy is Dangerous

This will be quick, but I saw this and I had to comment.

I was just reading an MSNBC article on a comment Bush made at a speech about Iraq losing 30,000 people since the war began. He then was asked questions from the audience, one being his administration's link of Iraq and Saddam to 9/11. This is what that moron said:

'Another questioner challenged the administration's linkage of the Sept. 11, 2001, terrorist attacks with the Iraq war. Bush said that Saddam Hussein was a threat and he was widely believed to have weapons of mass destruction, a belief that later proved false.

"I made a tough decision," Bush said. "And knowing what I know today I'd make the decision again. Removing Saddam Hussein makes this world a better place and America a safer country."'

So basically what he's saying is the WMDs really didn't matter in the decision to go to war: he just wanted Saddam out of power. Hey, the dude was a bad guy, and its better he's gone, right?

Well, by that logic, I hope the military is lining up to invade Cuba, Lybia, Iran, Syria, China, North Korea, and others who are bad. All of those countries are well-known to commit human rights violations and do not spread the democracy of justice's freedom, or whatever crap phrases Bush is using these days.

What gives Bush the authority to remove any world leader from power because he perceives them as a threat? Being president doesn't mean you just get to do whatever you want. He probably fell asleep in American Government class.

Watch out, world! If we don't like ya, we're comin' to get ya! Regardless if there is a good reason or or not!

USA! USA! USA!

Crunch Time

It's that time of year again: to become so engrossed in a subject that for a few days, you live and breathe it every second of the day.


This year, that subject for me is philosophy. I don't feel like I have as good a grip on the concepts as I did on my first test, so until Tuesday morning, I pretty much have to live philosophy.


I also have to find time for my world literature final as well, but philosophy will require a lot more study time and brain power than lit. But it cannot be tossed aside.

I need to make sure I can focus and get my work done without getting distracted or lazy.

I have both finals on Tuesday, and am leaving for break on Wednesday. I don't know if I'll get a chance to update before then.

For the next three days, I have to do the academic equivalent of Rocky's training in Russia in Rocky IV.



Now if I could just get "Burning Heart" to play in the library, I'd be set.

Morning, Morgantown!

At this time of the morning, I'm usually struggling to open my eyes, much less sit here and write something, but I woke up this morning and there was a ton of snow outside, and that always has a way of waking me right up; I'm pretty much still eleven years old. Whenever I wake up in the morning and it looks like there's a chance that school or classes will be cancelled, I can't go back to sleep, even though I don't have classes on Friday. Something about there being a good snowfall to wake up makes me all excited.

Silva puked yesterday morning, and I think there's some on the toilet seat.

I am officially done with my regular classes for this semester, but I'm not out of the woods by a long shot. I've got two finals back-to-back on Tuesday: Philosophy and World Lit. Luckily, the harder one, Philosophy, is first, so I can just wake up extra early and get some studying in before the final. That final is going to be tough. So tough in fact, that the professor and TA are holding three review sessions to prepare. One was on Wednesday night, and I actually left a WONY party we were having at a bar downtown to go review. I don't care if I'm a big nerd, grades are more important.

The WONY Festivus party wasn't technically a WONY party, since it was at a bar downtown and we were getting underage kids in, but for all intents and purposes, it was, only DJs and their friends allowed. I had this idea over the summer to have a station party at a bar, since a DJ rented out a bar about two years ago for his birthday, and it was awesome, especially for the kids who were underage at the time. The idea was to have everyone be able to mingle outside of the station, and just bond, and I think it worked out very well, everyone was having fun, and by the time it was over, we had the whole place singing along to the music on the stereo.

I have to call News 12 in a few days, and see if they got me on the schedule for when I get back. I'm hoping I get a lot of hours over break. Getting "in" there is the primary objective of my life at this point, maybe even more so than schoolwork.

I still can't think of anything I want for Christmas. If I don't get on it soon, I'm really going to have a crappy Christmas.

Me, Silva, Matt, and Gish are tentatively planning to go to Times Square for New Years Eve. I figure this would be the perfect time to do this in our lives, and if we don't do it while we're together in college, it probably won't ever happen. I think we would have a great time, like people screaming and confetti and shit. We all get so crazy over stuff like that.

I think I'm going to see Syriana tonight.

Well, my time's about up here. I think I'm going to go down to the Latte Lounge, maybe get something to eat, sit with a hot chocolate, and either read or do homework. I love that place. So relaxing.

Silva's Premonitions

Would you believe that nearly three months after the terror that is the Cremaster Cycle entered my consciousness (without any chance of being forgotten,) this horrible creation of Lucifer is still affecting my life? It's true. Silva went to the Hartwick College library a month ago and actually checked out the Cremaster 5 book under his own free will? He hid it in a drawer under my desk, came in and asked me for something out of it, and effectively ruined my day because of it. We both looked through it and got a good chuckle and shiver out of how insane the series truly is.

Owing to Silva's legendary lack of punctuality, the book is still in our apartment. We forgot about it, but recently began looking through it again. Actually, what happened was, I found a particularly disturbing photo in the back of the book, and left the book open to that spot under John's bedsheets. I would scan it to show you show fucked up it really is, but I would honestly feel uneasy about having it on my computer.

Regardless, a few days ago, John had been looking at it, then went to bed. The next day, he woke up saying he had out of control dreams all night long, including one where he was sitting in a room with a bunch of kids doing mushrooms. That day, he was talking to his friend online, and his friend told him he had a strange experience the night before: he had been smoking weed at a party or something in a room full of kids doing mushrooms.

Now, that's not really a big thing, Silva told me about it, and I kind of just dismissed it; I really didn't care. But then things got out of hand.

Saturday night, we had Matt, Gish, and Swan over for our now-usual few hours of poker and relaxing in the apartment before we go out for the night. While we were all sitting around, Matt pulled out the Cremaster book hidden underneath our coffee table and started thumbing through it. We told them it freaked both me and Silva out, and they looked through it a bit longer, then put it away. The next morning when Silva woke up, he told me and Matt about some wild nightmares he had, in particular, he said he had one where he was having sex with some girl when she started to stab him in the chest. We just laughed, not making any connection. Yet.

A day later, I am looking at the local paper online, and I become shocked at what I find.

"Lt. Joseph Redmond of the Oneonta Police Department said Francis J. Ricca, 20, of 63 Miller St. allegedly stabbed Jason Walker, 22, of 2 Meckley Ave., just before midnight Friday during a party at 97 Chestnut St., next to Iannelli's Ristorante."

Not only was there a stabbing the night he dreamt about it, but it was on our street. On our fucking street. Right up the road. At first I didn't make the connection, but when I did.....it was a little weird. Silva launched into an all out mindfuck; I think he was seriously spooked. And, to tell you the truth, it really is kind of freaky when you think about it. What are the odds? And all because he looked at the Cremaster.

We seriously have to get this book out of our apartment. It's causing bad things to happen. I told Silva he'll probably come in my room one morning to tell me not to drive my car that day.

Beware the ides of Silva.

A Pasticcio Post

-By some astounding jump in competence by CUAC, the organization that books speakers and lectures on campus, Cindy Sheehan, the mother who lost her son in Iraq and has since become a national figure, spoke here in Oneonta last night. The last two major events CUAC has had have been appearances by, no joke, Mr. Belding and Urkel. To see CUAC be able to get Sheehan up to this tiny college is amazing. However not surprisingly, the Ballroom where this was held was only about 2/3 full; the event wasn't really advertised, and college students care more about destroying the Flood and Covenant than current events and politics. The speech is what you would likely expect, but it was still cool to be able to see someone in the national spotlight. I was hoping some hillbillies from the outskirts of Oneonta would show up to fight with her over her opposition to Bush, but no such luck.

-Does anyone know how one goes about getting a rag? I have to get all dressed up for my final in interviewing class, and my dress shoes need to be polished, but I don't have any rags to use to shine them up. I don't have many handy resources, and I think using a paper towel wouldn't do the trick. When I shined them at home, I used a rag from our basement. But where can I get a rag up here? Do people buy rags? Where do they come from? Do they just suddenly appear in your house one day? If you don't have any old dish towels or some other kind of cloth that you are retiring to a rag pile, how would you get one? This popped into my head yesterday and I can't think of a solution.

-I'm getting real sick and tired of the phrase, "What happens in _____, stays in _____." Overused. It's dead. Not even if you're referring to Vegas. It's no longer clever.

-Now I'm not a doctor, but I think Silva must look like the charred smoker guy from Beetlejuice inside his body. I've never seen anyone eat so much crap and still look relatively healthy in my life. The kids eats at the very least a bag of chips every day, plus all the other crap throughout the day; he never stop eating. Yesterday, in a time span of a few hours, I know he ate two Celeste pizzas, a saucepan of teriyaki noodles, BBQ chicken, a bag of chips, and a bunch of beers. Who knows what he eats the rest of his day. All I know is he is like a garbage disposal, but does not put on a single pound; he's built like Eric Foreman on "That 70s Show." Me and Gish were talking about this, and determined it would be better for him if he did put on weight, because then at least he would be aware his body hates him. I wouldn't be surprised if we were all just hanging out and he dropped dead from clogged arteries and fructose poisoning. He told me:

"Whatever, I'll eat whatever I want. What happens if I get hit by a car and die tomorrow? Then I spent my last days on earth eating healthy."

Then, most likely from the affects of the never-ending food parade, he began to get a little crazy and irrational:

"Who says salad is so healthy? No one knows what eating salad all the time will do to your body thirty years from now. All of a sudden people just start eating salad all the time. Fuck that shit."

- I had a dream I was in some room and Kelly Clarkson was walking around naked. I didn't realize she liked me so much.

So long. Farewell. Auf weidersehen. Good bye.

A Date Which Will Live in Infamy

December 7. A date we are all taught about at a very young age. We all know of this date to be of supreme importance to our country. However, this December 7th will have a more profound impact, more life-altering consequences than Japanese ever imagined when they bombed Pearl Harbor.

December 7th, 2005. Taco Bell opens in Oneonta.

Now, I am a Taco Bell addict. I could eat there two times a day for the rest of my life. Where else could you get a full, satisfying meal for so cheap, one that is so stuffed with delicious Mexican tastes that sometimes I think if they one day passed a law saying only gay guys could eat Taco Bell, I would become "fabulous" just to partake?

That last sentence was all over the place. I'll give you a minute to gather your thoughts.

I'm sorry. But the thought of soon being able to indulge in crunchy tacos, chicken quesedillas, and the sultan of flavor, the Cheesy Gordita Crunch, whenever I feel like it makes me crazy. See? I did it again. But the fact is that Taco Bell was the last remaining piece of the fast food puzzle missing from Oneonta. And when you think of it, it is quite absurd to imagine that a town with TWO colleges could be sans T-Bell. Taco Bell is like the staple food of all peoples 18 - 26 years old.


Now right about now, you might be thinking I have a sick obsession with this fast food establishment. And up until a few days ago, I would have agreed with you: I never really met anyone outside of my circle of friends who loved Taco Bell so much; I mean, me and Silva drove nearly sixty miles round trip simply for some cheap Mexican food.

But you would be wrong. The buzz surrounding the opening of this place is amazing. Throughout campus, everyone not only is everyone anxiously anticipating the grand opening, but everyone knows the exact date. For a campus that really doesn't get all that involved in too many things going on around campus or in town (other than drinking,) this is amazing. It means that everyone else is as excited about it as me.

Now, knowing that a ton of kids must be awaiting the opening on both SUCO's and Hartwick's campuses (is there a plural for campus? Campi? No idea.), there are going to be lines out the ass there for about four days straight. Anyone who has gone to a Taco Bell around 1am on a weekend night knows that the drive-thru lines can build up quickly; you'll get ten, fifteen cars in line at some times. And knowing the build-up to this event is being anticipated like 5-year-olds on Christmas, I'm going to go out on a limb and guess they will run out of food on the first night/weekend (this actually is something I have encountered at a Taco Bell before.)

Kids are going to go apeshit for this place. Most oft he people I know, both the Bell obsessed and non-obsessed alike, will probably visit the restaurant within its first week. Everyone is so taco deprived that there is a craving rising in everyone. Hell, even I have only had it once in the last four months. You're going to think they are giving away 360s at this place, it'll be a zoo.

But now I know that on those late nights, when I'm drunk, tired, and pizza just will not do, I can head south of the border, get some Cheesy Gordita Crunches, and experience a moment of perfect contentment.


It will be like this opening day, I don't
doubt that for a second.

Slum Lord

I did not have a good Thanksgiving break. Nothing big, just the usual friends and family annoyances and arguments, but I really wanted a stress-free week. Unfortunately, that didn't happen. In fact, the time I spent at work and thoughts of coming back up to school were the best parts of the entire break.


Actually, I should clarify. I was looking forward to coming back up to school. That was until I got a call from Silva last night. He had come back a day early to work, and when he arrived in the apartment, he found that we had no heat. None. Somehow, our, to quote our landlord, "brand new" boiler broke and left the apartment ice cold. And considering it snowed a few inches since we left and we have experienced below normal temperatures the last few week, the place has been in a prolonged deep freeze. Silva ended up sleeping fully clothed in the fetal position with a number of blankets on him and a space heater blasting on his face.

You would think restoring a tenant's heat and hot water in late November would be a priority, but not for our landlord. When I got back in Oneonta, it was about 3pm, and unfortunately our heat was still broken. When I called the guy up, he said to me, "Yeah, I know, it's freezing there. I called my guy to come fix it, but he's not picking up his phone. I'll try to get him tomorrow. Later!"

I think this is honestly bordering on unlawful. If you can't get "your guy" to come fix our fucking heat for us in the winter in upstate New York, then get a new guy. Saying that it's the holiday weekend and he might just not want to do it is bullshit. I can guarantee that if it was the LANDLORD'S heat, it would be fixed immediately. Not only can't we really sleep here, but we can't bathe or cook, since we have no hot water to clean the dishes. It's an awful situation. Luckily, we got two space heaters for our rooms, and they're making it slightly more bearable, but it's still freezing in the hallway and living room, I'm guessing mid-30s.

So with a break that added extra stress, living in a meat locker, a paper due Thursday, and finals right around the corner, I am not looking forward to the next few weeks. I'm waking up extra early to run out to the coffee house down the street to warm up and get some work done in a peaceful, quiet atmosphere with an interior above freezing.

Love to Eat Turkey

Nothing much going on. Ate Thanksgiving dinner yesterday, have to work tonight, so I will miss out on the usual date.

Silva said he wants to put a little guest commentary on here about his experiences waiting in the rain for hours on end to get an XBox 360. I'm going to let him, so long as he doesn't talk about iPods. iPod iPod iPod, that's all that ever comes out of his mouth these days. YOU'RE BEHIND THE TIMES, JOHN, EVERYONE HAS ONE ALREADY.

Heading back up to school on Sunday.

Enjoy your Turkey Day.

Courvoisier and Cake

Gish is the baby of the group, and the last one of our circle of friends to turn 21. However, what this meant was that all the stops had to be pulled to celebrate.

As per Gish's request, we went to Applebee's for happy hour. I don't know why he specifically wanted to go there, but none of us were in a position to say no. Plus, they had half-priced appetizers at the time, so it wasn't all bad. We had the onion peels.

Anyway, before we got the party kicked off, a few of us pitched in a bought a bottle of Courvoisier for the party. We figured that it would a fun thing thing to do, we would never get the chance to party high class like that again, and its fun to feel like a rich black guy.

At first, the party seemed to be kind of a letdown; a bunch of people we invitied, and we were all sitting in the Elm Street kitchen, watching a few of the guys playing beer pong. We waited for awhile, decided we would get the party started regardless. We took the bottle of Courvoisier, walked into Swan's room, and put on the song which correponds to the liquor.

That's when things got crazy.

We were all a bit tipsy, and when we turned "Pass the Courvoisier" on, all of us got hyped, jumping up and down erratically. As soon as we broke the bottle open, and starting taking turns with it, about 45 people walked in the party; you would think it was planned. So now we were drinking high-class alcohol, jumping up and down to a rap song, with a crowd of people appearing and partying. If I didn't know any better I would have thought it was a liquor commerical.

After about ten minutes, the Courvoisier hit us all like a ton of bricks. Everyone who had some became kind of crazy and irrational; we were all just going completely insane. As I exited the bathroom, I see Gish covered in the cake baked for him, with Silva pouring beer all over his head. Being as drunk as I was, I just started throwing empty cups and beer cans at him. Supposedly, some random girl who was at the party picked up the cake and slammed it in Gish's face, causing there to be cake and frosting completely covering his room.

As we were getting ready to head out to the bars, Gish gives us all the "I'm gonna hook up with this bitch" glance, so we leave him for a fantastic night at the OST. We come to find out later the girl was sixteen years old.

So even though Gish didn't come out to the bars with us, and he committed a serious felony, we all had a blast.

As per custom, here are some of the highlights.

Paper Boy

The State Times, Oneonta's school paper, has a section every week containing interviews with WONY DJs. This is my interview.




Don't I look tough in the picture? I'm awesome.

That's a Crud Rock, It Belongs in Crud Town!

Crud Town being Oneonta.

Oneonta is Crud Town for the simple fact that weather patterns here make it nearly impossible for the human body to thrive. I have had a cold for about two weeks that decided to amp up the mucus early last week. I have had a runny nose and a sore throat for so long now, I forget what it's like to not wake up in the middle of the night coughing. I was carrying a bottle of Eckerd brand Chloraseptic around with me on campus the past few days, using it as a five to ten minute reprieve from the itchy fire which is laying waste to the back of my throat. This morning, I hocked up this gigantic, off-yellow colored phlegm ball into the bathroom sink, which swiftly slid in the drain like a slug. I'm going to the Health Center tomorrow; it's been too long to deal with this.

Now, speaking of weather patterns, my illness seemed to become supercharged at the same time when Oneonta was literally having one day with the highs in the 40s, and the next in the 70s, switching back and forth all week. This isn't supposed to happen in real life. Then, as final evidence of God's unhappiness with this town, we got a huge thunderstorm last night. Remember now, it's November. And they were forecasting snow to follow behind it. I'm surprised this town isn't just littered with bodies like the scene from Gone With the Wind, just hundreds of Confederate soldiers strewn across the landscape.

Other than that, my life has been pretty uneventful the last few days. Thanksgiving break is on the horizon, and I think everyone is a little preoccupied with just getting to that point so we can have an extended period of downtime at home. I'm just looking forward to having no responsibilities more than anything. I don't even care about being home too much; it will be nice to see my family and friends, but I enjoy just waking up at 11am, sitting around in the living room until whenever, and having a kitchen full of food at my disposal, without having to cook or prepare meals.

The monotony of schoolwork is putting me in a daze, where I'm just going with the motions without really thinking about it anymore.

Whatever. Do you care? Of course you don't. You come here to read funny stuff. Nothing above was funny. But, have faith. This Friday is Gish's 21st birthday, and we're all going to go all out to celebrate. No doubt there will be wacky shenanigans and pictures aplenty, so stay tuned until then.

For now, I have homework to attend to. Good day.

Additional Halloween/Christmas Pictures

Spooky Yuletide Cheer

I've never been a big Halloween guy; I just don't find much pleasure in spending a lot of time and energy into coming up with a costume to wear for one night. So this year, when everyone was planning what to wear to the big Elm Street party this Halloween, I was planning on resurrecting an old classic.

Saturday afternoon, a few hours before the party was starting, we all headed down to the Salvation Army to get Silva a cheap suit to dress up as Borat of Ali G. fame. As we were searching the endless racks in a place with 70s colored walls and terrible lighting, Gish finds a really gay looking cardigan sweater with football players on it, and topped off with a football shaped button. As he was (yes, its true) trying it on, Matt pulls out a tacky sweater with snowflakes all over it. Within a matter of seconds, we all find these yuppy sweaters, the kind you would see on people in 80s skiing movies. Someone passingly joked we should all wear them for Halloween.

As we started to collectively brainstorm, we all decided we would dress up in decked out in Christmas gear and play Christmas songs all night. On a whim, we went to Wal-Mart to see if they had Santa hats we could all wear to combine us as an ensemble, and some mini candy canes to give out to people during the night. By some astounding chance, they had all these items. They're really trying to start Christmas around mid-July now. I was at the big mall in Albany a few weeks ago, and Macy's already had those gigantic bows and wreaths everywhere.

But I digress. We get a bunch of Christmas songs together, got a wreath with lights on it, and had what basically amounted to a Christmas party. Now everyone one else was dressed up in the usual garb; witch, cowgirl, some S&M black lingerie angel, and so on. Luckily, everyone was feeling the Christmas motif. We were all going around throwing fake snow around, giving out candy canes to people, and had the entire party joining us in singing the carols. It was awesome. A bunch of kids tried to come in as Reservoir Dogs and act cool, but no one cared, we completely overshadowed any and all costumes there (except for the S&M angel). Nick also made a rare appearance, dressed as Stewie Griffin. And of course, since Nick was there, it meant I had to hit him over the head with a chair. Multiple times. We eventually destroyed the chair from slamming it on his head so much.

Then, out of nowhere, everyone starts fighting. Not real fighting, just play wrestling. Silva and Gish start going at it like two brown bears, with no finesse or style, just trying to throw each other down by the shoulders. After Gish got Silva in a headlock, someone egged me on to wrestle him. I really didn't want to, as Gish is 17x more in shape than me, and I was pretty drunk at that point. But I listened to peer pressure, and wrestled him. Big mistake. I was actually proud of myself, as I was able to use my wrestling techniques of old, and get Gish down and on his back without him killing me with his Abercrombie muscles. After I got up, I noticed I had a hole in my good khakis, which we all wore to complete our outfits. Then Little splotches of red began appearing on my pants leg. I ignored them at first, but then Kristin said they were getting bigger and rolled my pant leg up. I had blood covering my entire leg, with it running down into my sock. Turns out I landed my knee onto a bottlecap, which ripped my pants and cut me. It didn't hurt, but I ruined my pants, which got me down for a little while, but I eventually bounced back.

Then we ended up at the OST for the remainder of the night, singing with all the sexy nurses and Ninja Turtles.

All in all, an amazing Halloween. Considering we came up with the idea and executed it well in about 4 hours.

I'm proud that we came up with something pretty original, and not one of these "We'll all dress up as scumbag lawyers" or other such retarded ideas.

Coming Soon to a Theater Near You

Post about Halloween (complete with pictures!) coming soon.

It was crazy.

Ever Been to Shadow Moses?

Anyone who even remotely knows me personally will know why I liked this article so much:

Video-Game Character Wondering Why Heartless God Always Chooses 'Continue'

I mean, he even says his name is David at the end of the first one! Coincidence? I think not.

Luden's: Cough Medicine or Candy?

Because of the recent Noah reenactment going on in the Northeast part of the country, never ending rain topped off with a touch of 40-degree weather, I now find myself with a cold. And I'm one of these people who never gets sick; the total times I've been genuinely sick in the last ten years (not counting the times I faked it to get out of going to high school,) has to be less then five. So when I really am sick, it pisses me off. The amount of yellow/white colored snot that has been flying out of my nose has been astronomical, not to mention the incessant wet coughing.

To combat these symptoms, I picked up a box of Tylenol Cold with day and night tablets, and the essential remedy for anyone who has ever even remotely had a sore throat: Luden's Wild Cherry Cough Drops. When I pulled the bag off the shelf along with the box of Tylenol, Kristin says to me: "Oh please, like that's going to do anything. Luden's isn't medicine, it's candy." But is she right?

I can remember going to Walgreen's with my brother in Florida and buying the little boxes of Luden's with the little wax paper bag inside purely for the taste; I think it was my mother who introduced the little delicious red miracles to us.

My dad also once actually forced me to take a menthol Luden's when I had a cough on the way to a restaurant. I told him the menthol was making me feel nauseous. He told me to stop being such a little faker crybaby. I threw up when we got to the restaurant.

Asides from the evil menthol mutation, Luden's is admittedly a fantastic treat. They taste so good. You can't beat the delicious cherry flavor that seeps out of it. Most cough drops taste like grandpa; all medicine-y and unpleasant. Which is why Luden's is every sane person's choice when you have a tickle in your throat.

But do they actually work? It says the active ingredient in Luden's is pectin, which is apparently a cough suppressant. But when I checked the definition of pectin, it says:

1 : any of various water-soluble substances that bind adjacent cell walls in plant tissues and yield a gel which is the basis of fruit jellies
2 : a product containing mostly pectin obtained as a powder or syrup (as by extraction with acid of citrus peels, dried apple pomace, or dried sugar beet slices) and used chiefly in making jelly and other foods, in pharmaceutical products especially for the control of diarrhea, and in cosmetics

So pretty much, it doesn't have anything to do with a cough, unless that cough is coming out of your ass and is full of diarrhea. Plus, two of the inactive ingredients mentioned on the Luden's package are corn syrup and sucrose, which are sugar agents typically found in anything sweet.

And, to be honest, I really have never experienced any effects from using Luden's during a sore throat. I think the only reason you might feel better is because you end up eating like 40 of them and have more sugar in your blood than a gallon of Dr. Pepper.

So pretty much, Kristin caught me in my deceit: I can use my cough as an excuse to eat "medical" candy and not have to feel bad about it. Not that it will make me stop buying or eating them. They're too damn delicious.

Drunk Anyone?

I am drunk right now.

I saw Lisa P. tonight. She is visiting from Boston. I told her to chill with the 'I have no boyfriend' shit. It's annoying. Soory, but it is.

We broke out the Fly Creek bottle of wine tonight. Was a huge hit. Everyone loved it. Unfortunately, weveryone had some, so there's not much left. Whatevas.

For some reason, all my friends think I'm Jewsih. Literally. All of them think I am of the Jewish faith. I am not (not that there's anything wrong with that). But I'm not. I love Christmas.

We went ot the OST. Great time. Always clutch misic.

Yes, there are a lot of misspellings. I haven't drunk in al ong time. Excuse me.

Um.....what else?

For some reason, everyone at Monahan's party tponight who had Verizon as their cell carrier had their phones cloks 2 hours off. It was wierd. Anyone know why?

I have a teat on Thursday.

Not teat, test. Yes, I could have corrected the misspelling above., I don't care. It's funny.

I'm listening to 'A Lover's Concerto' right now.

The girl bleow sucked in high school.


I typed in 'Harborfields' into Yahho and this is what came up. Remember her? Damn, she was so fucking gay.


I'm going to be embarassed by this post in he morning.

Heroin = Success

For some reason, every movie I've watched for the last three weeks has involved heroin in one way or another. I'm really on a hot streak right now--The Doors, Trainspotting, Ray, and most recently Requiem for a Dream.

Not really having done many drugs, I am ignorant about subjects about this, but I can't imagine what the conversation must be like when someone wants to do heroin for the first time. Does it really look that appealing? First off, you're stabbing yourself with needles. Second, all the people you hang out with who are doing it are fucking insane; they are all gaunt and crazy-looking, living on a soiled mattress in some dump where everything is covered in mold and the clap.

If you are a person today who has seen movies like these, and STILL does it, you shouldn't be alive anyway. There's no way you can watch a movie like Requiem for a Dream and still want to try it. After seeing that gigantic purple open wound Jared Leto had on his arm at the end of the movie, I would swear off anything that caused it; if you told me he got that because of masturbation, that would be the end of my all-time favorite hobby. Nothing could make me do it if I thought it would result in that fucking pus dripping thing.

However, if you look at it, heroin is also the cause is some of the greatest music in history. The Doors and Ray Charles alone made some fantastic music during their times of high drug abuse. And I think the guy from Sublime was a heroin junkie, too. I'm sure there are hundreds of others.

You know what? Screw it. If you're a semi-talented musician, I advise you to try heroin. So what if you'll alienate yourself from everyone and everything you've ever loved? You'll make some kick ass tunes.